The Art of Letting Go: 13 Tips

“People say that if you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours; if not, then it never really was.” – Unknown

This is the best way to describe letting go of things in your life-whether they are memories or people. You may think that holding on is easier than letting go but this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Letting go can be a difficult thing for many reasons and because of this we also need to know how to handle these situations when they come up in our lives.

There’s no one right way to do so and different techniques work better with different types of emotions which makes understanding what type of situation you’re going through very important. This article will explore 13 secrets to help you let go of all those things that cause you pain-whether it’s the past, your current situation or your future worries.

Stop Resisting

One of the main reasons we have trouble letting go is because we are resisting what is happening. We are holding on to the past and refusing to let go of our anger, sadness or hurt. This only serves to keep us trapped in that space and prevent us from moving on.

The more you can accept what is happening-the good and the bad-the easier it will be to let go. Don’t resist the feeling of sadness or anger but let yourself feel it completely. The more you fight against it, the stronger it will become.

Give Yourself Time

Another reason we have trouble letting go is because we think we should be able to do it immediately. We feel guilt when we have been hurt by someone and so we want to apologize or say how much it hurts us. But the other person is not ready for this and has their own concerns so they cannot accept what you are saying right now.

It’s best to just give yourself time to heal from the pain before saying anything about it. If you can just stop and wait patiently to speak, you will find it becomes much easier.

Remember What You Learned

When things happen in life that cause us pain, we should learn from them. We can’t let go of painful memories if they are teaching us something about ourselves or the world-even if what we learned isn’t a pleasant lesson.

If you can remember what you learned from a particular experience and how it has helped you grow, then you will be able to let go of the pain that came with it. You don’t need to forget what happened, just put it in perspective so that it doesn’t hurt as much.

Write It Down

If you are having a lot of trouble letting go of something, it can be helpful to write it down. This will allow you to express all the feelings you are holding onto and help you to see them more objectively. It also makes it easier to deal with them when they are outside of your head.

You can write in a journal, on a blog or even just in a notebook. The important thing is to get your feelings out so that you can start to process them.

Let Yourself Grieve

When something bad happens, we often try to ignore our feelings or push them down. We don’t want to deal with the pain so we try to act like it didn’t bother us. But this doesn’t work and the feelings will only come back stronger.

It’s important to let yourself grieve when something bad happens. This means that you should allow yourself to feel all the emotions associated with the pain-anger, sadness, hurt, etc. You don’t have to do it all at once but taking the time to experience the sadness will help you heal.

Remain Detached

Many times people feel like they need to take action after something bad happens because they want to fix it. They think that if they do enough, then all their pain will go away and everything will be right with the world again.

But when you are in pain, it’s important to realize that you can’t control what happens. Allowing yourself to be detached from the outcome will allow you to heal without feeling like you have failed if things don’t work out in the end.

Let Go of Your Ego

We often hold onto feelings because we feel like we need people’s approval or acceptance. We might feel like we deserve to be hurt or that it’s okay for other people to do the same thing to us because of something we did in the past. But this is our ego taking control and it only serves to keep us trapped in pain.

When you are feeling down about yourself or others, take some time alone to center yourself. Look at your thoughts and see if they are being driven by your ego or if they are truly what you want to think or say.

Get Yourself Involved

When we are in pain, it can be very hard to accept that things will never go back to the way they were before. This is why many people spend their time thinking about ways to get back what they have lost. They cannot move forward because they are stuck in the past.

Getting yourself involved in something new can help you see that life is more than just your current situation. You will be able to learn and grow from new experiences which will give you a feeling of purpose again.

Be Your Own Best Friend

Treating yourself with the same love and respect you would show a friend is one of the best ways to let go of pain. When you are constantly beating up on your ego, it’s easy to give in and project negative thoughts onto yourself. But when you treat yourself kindly, then it will be easier to get out of the habit of thinking negatively about yourself.

Get Out and Meet New People

When you are trying to let go of bad feelings, it’s easy to want to retreat from the world and avoid people. But this won’t make it any easier for you to heal since you will still feel like crap inside even if no one else knows.

Instead, try to get out and meet new people. This will help you to see that there is more to life than the pain you are feeling right now. You will also start to build new relationships which can be a great support system.

Don’t Bottle Things Up

We often try to bottle things up because we don’t want to hurt people or we think that they can handle it better. But when you are in pain, it’s important not bottle things up because that is when you start feeling worse about yourself.

This doesn’t mean that you have to share your every thought with the world either. Simply talking to someone close to you will be enough to help you process the pain.

Let Go of the Past

When you are feeling down, it’s easy to want to focus on all the things that have gone wrong. But this is only holding you hostage and preventing you from moving forward.

Take some time to write down your best moments as well as your worst. Then look at them together and try to learn something from each one. This will help you see that life can be full of pain and happiness and it’s all about the journey.

Don’t Be Afraid of Taking a Step Back

When we are going through a tough time, it’s easy to think that we have to keep going. But this simply isn’t true and you should never be afraid of taking a step back if things become too much for you.

Remember that the journey of life is filled with ups and downs, if it were easy then we wouldn’t appreciate what we have at all. So take some time out to process your pain but don’t worry too much about it because life isn’t always fair and sometimes all you can do is take a step back.


Letting go of past pain and moving on is a necessary skill that we need to learn. This article has introduced you to 13 ways that you can use in order to let go of your pain. Remember that letting go isn’t always easy, but if these tips don’t work for you-remember there is always another way.